Reaching out for help is an important strategy to bolster mental health and well-being. But for many children and youth, it can be difficult to take that first step.

Sometimes, students may not be sure how to start a conversation, may not know that what they’re experiencing is related to a mental health concern or may wonder if their concern is big enough to share.

Schools can play a powerful role in promoting help-seeking, showing students that it’s okay to reach out for help and that there are supports available within the school and community if needed.

Why this is important

Research shows that most Ontario youth who receive mental health support do so through their schools. However, there are several barriers, including:

• stigma related to mental health
• systemic oppression resulting in inequitable access to care
• a lack of identity-responsive supports and services
• negative help-seeking experiences resulting in mistrust
• the need for greater mental health literacy among students, parents/caregivers and school staff
• uncertainty about where to turn for help
• fear of being labelled or about what might happen after reaching out for help (e.g., will my preferences be respected?)

These barriers mean that many students who may benefit from mental health supports do not receive the help they need.

Promoting help-seeking in schools helps to:

• Reduce stigma by making conversations about mental health part of everyday life.
• Support early identification so that emerging mental health concerns are noticed and addressed sooner.
• Build student confidence and a sense of hope.
• Strengthen relationships between students, school staff and families.
• Improve outcomes, both academically and emotionally.

A school culture that promotes help-seeking creates pathways to support so that every student knows help is available and that they don’t have to face challenges alone.

Encouraging help-seeking in schools

Help-seeking begins with trust and connection. When students feel seen, valued and understood, they are far more likely to share when something is wrong.

School staff can promote help-seeking by:

• talking openly about mental health and wellness at school
• modeling healthy coping strategies
• destigmatizing support by emphasizing that everyone needs help sometimes
• discussing with students where to go for help, including multiple entry points, in-school supports (e.g., trusted school staff, regulated mental health professionals), community supports (e.g., helplines)
• helping students identify the people, places and things that are part of their circle of support

What help-seeking looks like

Help-seeking doesn’t always mean asking directly for “mental health support.” It can look like:

• a student who withdraws or isolates from peers
• a student who asks for extra time or space to complete work
• a student who shares a personal concern during a conversation or includes themes of concern in their schoolwork (e.g., art, creative writing)
• a student who acts out or seems distracted, signaling deeper stress
• a student who brings forward a concern about a friend or peer

These moments offer opportunities to connect and guide the student toward further support. School staff can respond with care by listening, validating the student’s experience and linking them to the support they need within the school or community.

The ways in which students seek help may be informed by their intersecting identities, perspectives and experiences. There is no single right way for students to reach out for help. Even if you are not identified as the student’s caring adult, when a student has a concern about their mental health, you play an important role in linking them with a trusted adult that can support their help-seeking.

Responding when a student reaches out

When a student seeks help, the most important response is to listen without judgment and to validate what they’re feeling.

Here are key steps to guide your response:

• Find a quiet, private space to talk.
• Listen actively: give your full attention and avoid rushing to solve the problem.
• Acknowledge their courage for reaching out for help.
• Avoid minimizing or dismissing their feelings or experiences.
• Link the student to additional support, following your school or board’s mental health protocols as appropriate.
• Follow up after your initial conversation to check in.

Partnering with students to centre their needs and preferences whenever possible builds trust and supports a positive help-seeking journey.

While schools can encourage students to seek help, all school staff play an important role–building supportive relationships with students can enable staff to notice and respond to signs of emerging mental health concerns.

How to tell if more support is needed

Your work to notice and respond to emerging mental health concerns is crucial.  You can work collaboratively as part of a team to provide caring support at school.

Follow your school board’s protocol for accessing mental health support. This may include:  

• consulting with your principal, vice-principal or member of your school’s mental health leadership team  
• discussing what you have noticed with the student and/or their parent/caregiver  
• linking students and parents/caregivers, if appropriate, to the supports they need in the school and community

In your role, you may continue to stay connected with a student as they access professional mental health services. There are specific strategies you can use to support students who are receiving mental health treatment.

It’s essential that you take care your own mental health and well-being as you support students with help-seeking. Consider the strategies within the Take Care of Yourself resource, or other strategies you may already use to support your own mental health.

How to access help for a student

If you’re not sure what your protocol is, ask your principal or a member of your school’s mental health team. Use the following steps as a guide:

• If your concern is urgent (e.g., suicide risk or risk to others/imminent danger), act immediately to activate school protocols. Never leave the student alone.
• If there’s no immediate threat, track the changes you are noticing in the student’s expression of thoughts, feelings and actions. Try universal classroom mental health strategies.
• Connect with the student and see if they are open to discussing your observations.
• You can have a conversation with your principal, vice-principal or someone else on your school’s mental health team, either for guidance or to help link the student to appropriate supports.
• Once other staff are involved, additional district-level supports may be accessed, and the student may be referred to professional mental health support within the school board or community.

Your role extends beyond helping the student access support. For students experiencing a mental health problem, you can be an important part of their journey toward taking care of their mental health and well-being.

Identity + help-seeking

Not all students have the same experience when accessing mental health supports. For some, help-seeking is more difficult due to stigma, language barriers, discrimination or past experiences.

To make help-seeking identity-affirming and responsive:

• Acknowledge and respect that there is diversity in the way wellness and mental health is understood and approached.
• Engage families as partners in mental health discussions, honouring their perspectives and strengths.
• Offer multiple ways for students to access support (e.g., speaking, writing, connecting through a trusted adult).
• Be mindful of intersectionality–students’ identities and lived experiences shape how they experience mental health and care.
• Offer culturally relevant and identity-specific supports through school and community providers, valuing both formal and informal supports (e.g., cultural leaders, etc.).

When help-seeking feels supportive and inclusive, students are more likely to reach out and access the care they deserve.

How to support students who are receiving mental health treatment

You may have been part of the team that helped notice and identify a concern for an individual student, or you are working with a student who is currently receiving mental health treatment. Below are some ideas for how you can continue to support a student who is receiving mental health treatment.

• Continue with daily actions to promote mental health and well-being, including supporting the student with stress management and coping strategies that they have identified as working for them.
• When appropriate, participate in meetings with the student, parents/caregivers and involved mental health professionals to learn about the strategies being recommended.
• Ask the mental health professionals questions if you’re not sure what something means, e.g., “Is that a strategy that we can help reinforce at school?”.
• Prioritize the student’s needs, goals and desires, and work to achieve them together.
• Ensure that everyone is working toward the same goal as the student; students benefit from coordinated support.
• Whenever possible (and with consent), collaborate with partners such as parents/caregivers, family members, Elders, knowledge keepers, cultural organizations and members of a faith community.
• Be open to new ideas, strategies and approaches based on how others may understand the students’ mental health.
• Work collaboratively with the student, parents/caregivers and community to support additional accommodations needed at school.
• Communicate changes (progress and challenges) with all involved.
• Schedule reminders for yourself to do regular check-ins to see how things are going and what you can do to help.
• Notice and reinforce when a student uses strategies and coping skills that work for them.
• Reinforce strategies suggested by the school mental health professional at school.

Resources to support help-seeking

What to do if you’re concerned about a student’s mental health

• Available in print
• Classroom resource

No Problem Too Big or Too Small: student help-seeking resource

• Tip sheet

Reaching Out Tips for Students

• Guide/tool

ONE-CALL Desk Reference

• Tip sheet

Talking with Parents and Families about Mental Health

• Available in print
• Guide/tool

My Circle of Support – Student Help-Seeking Resource

• Guide/tool

Circle of Support and System Pathways – Flowchart, Planner and Desk Reference

• Guide/tool

Supporting Minds Strategies at a Glance